If we meet somewhere in passing

Please don’t nod or wave, don’t smile,

Do not in any way acknowledge me,

Much too late now for us to be old friends.

Those shards of glass or bone you see pitted

Deep into my face are the remnants

Of what you weren’t content to fracture

But had to shatter making clear

If you were not to be my chosen one

You would make certain no one would

Choose me.

If you hear of me, or where I am

Or who I’m with, please don’t think

You have the right to contact me:

Don’t pick up a telephone in the belief

That we will have a cozy chat and reminisce,

Share intimacies, be critical, make fun

Of last night’s dinner guests drinking too much

Or telling,  yet again,  stories of baby daughters

Adolescent sons; don’t even for a second

Imagine there will ever be a time when 

I’ll forget that demonic, violent stare

And the way your eyes glared into mine

But failed to see the fear and terror

You engendered there, on that raw night;

The horror of what I saw in you

Comes back in dreams, crushes 

Every semblance of trust I long to have;

You should be overjoyed, 

You got your way;

So don’t be fretting that you’re missing out

On time with me;

Believe it,  we’re together every day.

 Jan 

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